Rollin’ and Pickin’
There is a strange phenomenon
that nobody exposes –
how millions of Americans
while driving, pick their noses.
They think that safe behind the wheel
they’ll never be found out,
so merrily they roll along
while knuckle-deep in snout.
I guess it’s out of boredom that
they take proboscis pause,
for every time I glance askance,
there’s someone up their schnoz.
To lose the damning discharge
is a duo-digit feat.
They roll it twixt index and thumb,
and stash beneath the seat.
Or if they think that hiding it
is just a little sick,
they launch their snoot-bomb skyward
with an incognito flick.
In closing, I’ve discovered
the American ideal –
“Keep your shoulders to the grindstone
and your noses at the wheel.”